I'm not what people thought I was
by ParzivalHallows
Summary: Anakin has been raised in the Jedi temple since birth, but things start to change when he fights in the Clone Wars. Friendships are shattered, hearts are broken, and when Anakin is captured by the Sith, nobody can trust him or his intentions.
1. Conceived by MidiChlorians

**Title: **I'm not what people thought I was

**Summary: **Anakin has been raised in the Jedi temple since birth, but things start to change when he fights in the Clone Wars. Friendships are shattered, hearts are broken, and when Anakin is captured by the Sith, nobody can trust him or his intentions.

**Chapter: **Conceived by Midi-Chlorians

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Star Wars (for whole story)

**This story was originally SodapopXPonyboylover (my alternate account)'s story, but I forget my login, so I'm publishing it on here. **

…

A beam of sunlight shone through the four large windows that surrounded the Council Chambers. In the middle of the room, standing above the broad circle on the floor, stood a man. He had wispy brown hair which fell right below his shoulders, and intelligent blue eyes that met the gazes of each and every one of the human's and humanoids sitting in the chairs around the circle; the chairs were designed for their specific species. Not only was this man's appearance a shock to the Council, for he was supposed to be away on a mission with his Padawan, who was only at the age of fourteen - which was considered young for someone in his position. Younglings became Padawan's (if they were chosen by a Master) at the age of ten, and he had only been an apprentice for only four years. The most shocking thing about this man's visit though, was the fact that he was cradling a soft bundle in his arms. The little boy inside the blankets was sleeping, but something radiated around him.

"Brought here, what have you, Knight Jinn?"

"A child, Master Yoda."

Master Yoda's ear flicked, if not impatiently. "See that, we can. Why brought him, have you?"

"His mother died in childbirth Master, he has no one to take care of him."

"Why have you brought him here?" Mace demanded suddenly, intrigued. Qui-Gon Jinn was a man known for many things, most of all his stubborn attitude towards the Jedi Council, but he had never done anything without a good reason. He was a wise and powerful Jedi Knight, and the Council had wanted him in their ranks, but Qui-Gon had refused, stating "There is no place for me here, I do not feel things the way you do". Mace was still disappointed; he would have been such an asset to them.

"The ship me and my Padawan were on got hit, I do not know by what. We were forced to land on the planet Tatooine, where we had the unfortunate experience of meeting a slave dealer," Everyone in the room stiffened, for slavery had been banned among the Republic. "Through him, we met one of his slaves, Shmi Skywalker. She was heavily pregnant, but showed us kindness and offered to help with our ship nonetheless. After a while of hard work and dedication on Shmi's part, our ship was finally fixed. But I had the nagging feeling that we should stay with Shmi, Obi-Wan had the same feeling. It were as though the Force were telling us to stay with her – so we listened.

"Shmi offered us shelter at her place where we lived for about a month when suddenly Shmi went into labor. She was rushed to their version of a Medical Center - which is more or less a pile of dirt with inexperienced Doctor's hanging around it – and there she gave birth to a baby boy. Anakin Skywalker." As Qui-Gon said this last part, the baby stirred slightly, as though reacting to his name. "Right before she died, she told us that there was no father, and to take him. She couldn't stand seeing her son grow up a slave. She was in pain; a lot of pain, but with a will of her own she wouldn't surrender to the Force until we gave her our word.

"The thing that stuck out the most to us though, was the fact that she said there was no father. We asked the Doctors, and after several tests they confirmed that she had in fact been, a virgin. A strong ripple in the Force caught Obi-Wan's and my attention, and we located the source to be from the boy. He was definitely a Force-sensitive, and one of the strongest one's I've felt so far. I was curious though, and ran a blood sample for the midi-chlorian count. Once we safely reached the ship and with the baby unharmed, we checked the midi-chlorians. He has over 20,000 Masters. If I'm not mistaken, there has never been a Jedi with a midi-chlorian count that high."

There was a silence as the Council digested this information, then suddenly Mace Windu spoke.

"You refer to the prophecy of the Chosen One? The one who will bring balance to the Force; you believe it to be this boy?"

Qui-Gon nodded, and the baby in his arms yawned in its sleep. "I have never felt such a strong presence in the Force before, I have reason to believe he was conceived by the midi-chlorians. Please, Masters, you must allow him the chance to become a Jedi."

"Take this into consideration, we shall, for now, sent to the crèche, the baby will be."

Qui-Gon's shoulders sunk and he visibly relaxed, shifting the baby closer to him. "Thank you Masters." He bowed.

"Dismissed, you have not been. You spoke of your apprentice, Padawan Kenobi. Where is he now?" Yoda asked.

"I have sent Obi-Wan to the Room of a Thousand Fountains to help him concentrate during his Meditation. He's taken Shmi's death extremely hard."

Yoda nodded, "Attached, the boy has become?"

There was a pause when Qui-Gon said, "He was scared when we arrived on Tatooine. He ached to go back to the Jedi Temple so bad, but for the short while we were there, he had almost given up hope he would ever see it again. Shmi gave him that hope back, she was his light in a dark time for him. She was a mother figure to him."

"Attached, as well, you have become?"

"I viewed Shmi in very high respect, and cared for her deeply, but I knew when to let her go. It was her time, and I have only ever wanted her to be happy."

The Council looked at each other before saying, "You are dismissed. Bring the boy to the crèche, he will be cared for there until we come to a decision."

Qui-Gon bowed again, "Thank you Masters."

…

"You're upset?"

Qui-Gon looked up from the baby Anakin at the question. The speaker was a very young and very beautiful Togruta named Mishka Ali; she was completely russet on her face except for two patches of white underneath her eyes that trailed down to her chin, making them look like permanent tearstains. Small dots of white also surrounded her eyes, which were a brilliant green color. The rest of her body was completely laced in russet and white, a pattern that repeated itself all the way down to her feet. She was smiling knowingly at him.

Qui-Gon lifted his head up slightly, "I've traveled a long way with this boy. It's difficult not to get…attached." As though confirming the question, Anakin let out a coo from where he was stationed in Qui-Gon's arms. Qui-Gon smiled down at him, as did Mishka.

"He's very beautiful, and I can feel the Force flowing from him. Is that normal?" she asked. She knew about the Force and was slightly Force-sensitive herself, but she stayed in the nursery with all of the younglings. She didn't want to be a Jedi and she hadn't wanted to be sent to the AgriCorps, so she became the former Caretaker's apprentice. The Caretaker had been old though, and died shortly after Mishka was apprenticed. Luckily, she lived long enough to teach Mishka everything she knew.

"No, it's not. That's why this baby is so important. I believe he may…play an important role." Qui-Gon said hesitantly, not wanting to give too much away. Mishka studied him curiously; her eyes seemed to bore into his very soul. He fidgeted, and finally she looked away, smiling softly.

"I sense no lie in you, I will take the baby from here. What did you say his name was?"

"Anakin…it's Anakin…"

"Anakin…" Mishka repeated, smiling down at the baby. She looked up at Qui-Gon, "May I?"

He nodded and handed Anakin towards her, she gently enveloped him in her arms. "Hello Anakin, you will be cared for." She spoke softly. Anakin just looked at her with big blue eyes, blinking slowly as though wondering how he had gotten out of Qui-Gon's arms.

Qui-Gon cleared his throat, and leaned over the baby in Mishka's arms. "Goodbye Anakin, perhaps we will meet again." He smiled sadly and planted a very small kiss on the baby's head before walking swiftly out of the room, not even saying goodbye. Mishka wasn't offended though; she had parents often do the very same thing. It was just their way of grieving with the knowledge that the babies wouldn't be considered their children any more.

Mishka started cradling baby Anakin. "You'll be safe with me. You must be hungry, I will feed you sweetheart." She carried the baby away into the Nursery Chambers; there were about thirty bassinet's lined up along the walls. In the middle of the room was the playpen; holographic stars filled the ceiling, making it look as though there weren't a ceiling at all, but just the night sky. In the daytime, the stars were replaced with bright clouds, and sometimes rainbows.

"You'll be okay." Mishka whispered, feeding the baby boy. His small suckling sounds could be heard through the whole chamber, "I'll be sure of it."

…


	2. Unexpected Visitors

**Chapter: **Unexpected Visitors

…

"To what do I owe this pleasant surprise, Masters?" Mishka's eyes widened at her own question. Standing in front of her were no other than Masters Mace Windu, Yoda, And Ki-Adi-Mundi.

"We have come to check upon one of the babies, may we come in?" Mace asked.

Mishka had the feeling that she knew which baby they were talking about, but she didn't want to give into it just yet. "I suppose." She said stiffly, stepping aside and allowing the Masters inside. Master Yoda's gimer stick echoed through the nursery chambers as he walked slowly inside; he stopped as soon as the doors closed behind him and allowed himself a small break. His eyes closed, and then snapped open again.

"Over there, the boy lay." He said, pointing towards the bassinet on the farthest side of the room. Windu and Adi nodded, and headed over to the bassinet, Mishka close on their tails. Yoda trailed behind more slowly, taking in each and every one of the children.

"This is Anakin Skywalker," Mishka said once they reached the crib. "What is it that you want with him?"

The Council members exchanged glances before Master Windu asked, "Mishka, could you step outside for a minute? We need a moment alone with young Skywalker."

Mishka's eyes narrowed dangerously, but she did as they asked without lashing out at them.

Windu studied the baby curiously; he was kicking his little feet up in the air and suckling at the end of his blanket. He looked up at the Masters and cooed slightly, still sucking his blanket. Windu never really liked children, they were just little people to him, but this child was different. Something about him sent shivers down his spine. The Force was literally flowing through the child, confirming Qui-Gon's suspicions about him being conceived by the midi-chlorians.

"You felt it to?" Master Adi asked, looking towards Mace, who looked at Yoda, who nodded. "Very strong in the Force, this boy is." Yoda said, ears drooping.

"He is so small though, how can he bring balance to the Force?" Windu asked, confused and annoyed. Yoda chuckled, which only pricked his annoyance more.

"Grow up, a youngling does. Same as the others, this boy is." He smiled at the small baby, who had lost interest in them and turned to look in the opposite direction where there was a wall…apparently a wall was more enthralling than them.

Mishka's voice sounded from outside, "With all due respect Masters, the babies must be fed."

"Of course," Mace said, passing by her, "We were just leaving." The rest of the Council followed behind him like puppies.

Mishka shook her head, annoyed. They had no right dropping in here unannounced like that! She closed her eyes, and feeling the Force flow towards her, managed to calm herself down.

"Stay calm Mishka, they are gone now." She whispered to herself.

Anakin turned to look at her. "Goo?" he babbled.

"Hey sweetie, you're going to have to wait to be fed, I have to attend to the other children first."

Anakin's face turned red and soon him and the rest of the babies were crying. She sighed – she had dealt with many Force-sensitive's before but none so in tune, and she had definitely not stumbled upon one who could manipulate the emotions of those around him. But then again, Anakin was different.

"Alright, alright." She said, for the sake of her own ears. "I guess I'll have to feed you first."

Suddenly the noise in the crèche died down as Anakin's crying stopped abruptly. Mishka frowned and picked up the baby, feeding and burping him. As soon as she was done she rushed to the other children.

The first child she went to, was her nephew Shaal Tano. He looked up at her, his head tails quivering slightly as he yawned. She smiled and picked him up, feeding him. He usually drank the most milk out of all of the babies, so it took longer to feed him. When he was done she burped him and moved to the next few kids, Elenar'e Kilsh (a Twi'Lek), and a human named Ash-Ke Leighton. These were her favorite children along with Anakin, and it was funny because they usually played together in the playpen. It was like they were already friends even though they weren't even crawling yet.

She fed the rest of the babies; and finally the children, along with her, were all fast asleep under the projected starlit ceiling.

…

**Yes this is an extremely short chapter. I know and I'm sorry :/ I'm having writers block right now though. I mean - I have my plotline written out and everything, but it's hard filling in the details. Hopefully the next chapter will be longer, no promises though. **


	3. Second Visits and Annoyingly Calm

**Title: **Second Visits and Annoyingly Calm

…

Many months had passed since Anakin first came under Mishka's care. In those months, fun and exhausting times were completely normal. She had gotten a big shocker though, in his sixth month, when she walked in to find all of the babies levitating over their cribs – except Anakin. He was sitting up, babbling to himself and biting the end of his blanket, completely oblivious to the flying babies around him. Mishka could feel the Force radiating from him, which was stringing to all of the floating babies – some of which were asleep. She could even feel a string of itself wrapping around her but Anakin wasn't strong enough to lift an adult just yet. Still, it scared her something awful.

"Anakin!" she had yelled, and raced towards the floating babies, one-by-one pulling them from out of the air and putting them back in their cribs. Anakin turned to look at her, a blank look on his face.

"No," she scolded, gently slapping his hand. He looked down at his hand and tears rose to his eyes. Mishka was tempted to roll her own; but she didn't. "Come now Anakin that didn't hurt."

Anakin's lip quivered but he didn't start crying, he just looked up at her with sad eyes. Mishka sighed, he was giving her those puppy-dog eyes…she just had to do something! She picked him up and started cradling him. "It's okay Anakin, I'm not mad at you."

She heard a sniffle and Anakin's tiny fist squeezed her head-tail, searching for support. She didn't mind though, even though head-tails were a sensitive place for Togrutas, his tiny fists caused not even a tweak of pain. "Come on now, Ani. I have to see to it that the other babies are alright." She put an unwilling Anakin back down in the crib. _Hopefully they won't all be scarred for life, _she thought disgruntled, _imagine that! Waking up to find you're hovering ten feet over your crib. Remarkable!_

She gave a silent chuckle and checked over all of the younglings once again, just for good measure. Then she left to catch up on some much-needed sleep.

…

"You know, frankly, I'm getting rather tired of your unexpected and _unwelcomed _visits." Mishka said abruptly, stressing the 'unwelcome' part. She didn't care if these were Jedi Masters on the Jedi Council – they had just woken her from a nice nap! The first good sleep she'd had for…well…since Anakin came to her.

Speaking of Anakin…

"Disrupt you, we did not mean to." A tiny little troll with brown/grey hair looked up at her. "See the boy, we must."

Mishka almost rolled her eyes; trust Master Yaddle to turn her own words against her. "Fine. But let me assure you, this will be the last time I will allow you to come in here. I have every right to kick you out right now." She warned.

"Do that, you will not have to. Last time, this is." Yaddle said, bowing her head slightly as she acknowledged the threat.

"Good." Mishka grunted, suddenly feeling foolish. She shouldn't be acting like this; it wasn't caring and it just wasn't…her. She blamed it on Anakin; even though she loved him to death, he really gave her a run for her money.

She followed the Grand Masters as they made their way through the crèche. One of the younglings started to cry and Master Yaddle acted so quickly that Mishka hadn't even seen it coming. Master Yaddle had pulled out her gimer stick and _whacked _the crib as hard as she could. The baby stopped crying abruptly.

"Master Yaddle I—"

"Peace, young Caretaker Ali. Find you will, it will be soothing, to the child that is."

Mishka raised an eyebrow, and pursed her grey lips. She highly affirmed that the child had probably been anything _but _soothed. She was sure the child had shut up out of fear, rather than appeasement. She wished it had been Master Yoda who had come, for Master Yaddle was definitely not kid-friendly. Master Yoda always had a soft spot for younglings.

"This is him?" Aayla Secura asked, her light blue head tilting to the side as she looked at baby Ani. He blinked sleepily at her, and yawned; his little body shook with the ferocity of that yawn.

"Yes this is him, and as you can see he's highly tired so I suggest that you-" Mishka suddenly cut herself off. She felt a sudden warmth radiate towards her, and she could detect Anakin's presence behind it.

"I'm sorry for my behavior," she apologized, wondering by the Force what she was saying. "I should leave you alone with him now." She smiled at them, and they cocked their heads, as though wondering why she had the sudden mood change. Then their eyes glistened with understanding as they looked from Anakin, to Mishka, and then back to Anakin.

"He's strong in the Force." Aayla observed. "He will make a powerful Jedi."

Mishka would have liked to growl, but she was feeling unnaturally calm for some reason. "Yes, he's the most powerful I ever encountered at this age." She said proudly. Masters Yaddle and Aayla smiled at each other, each knowing that she had not intended to say that, but was unable to stop it.

"We thank you for your kindness," Aayla said, still smiling. "This will be our last visit, come now Ani." She smiled and lifted the sleepy baby out of the crib. Mishka stopped as Aayla's eyes suddenly shut and she pressed a finger against Anakin's head. She stood so still, for so long that Mishka was about to ask her if she was alright…had it not been for Master Yaddle's gimer stick.

"OW!" she exclaimed, rubbing her shin where she had been struck by the offending stick.

"Quiet, you must be." Master Yaddle hissed.

So they sat and watched in silence as Aayla continued the presentation, then her eyes opened and she smiled broadly. "He truly is the one," she sounded excited, "the one the prophecy foretold!"

_Joy, _Mishka thought dryly. As if Anakin hadn't been enough of a trouble, dragging the Council in every few minutes and levitating babies, now it was _confirmed _that he was the 'Chosen One'.

Suddenly Master Yaddle chuckled, and if Mishka's skin hadn't already been red, she was sure it would have been soon. Her horrified eyes told all though – she had actually said that out loud. _Out loud!_

"I sense much rebelliousness from this child." Master Yaddle chuckled again. "Leave now, we will. Goodbye Caretaker Ali."

Mishka smiled and watched as they left, then she sighed and turned towards Anakin. She shook her head at him, "Don't do that again." She scolded him softly. The only reason she scolded him at all was the fact that she was annoyed – she had a say in this and now it was taken away from her! Oh by the Force this child was going to be the death of her someday…

…

_8 ½ months later_

The middle of the night. He just _had _to choose the middle of the night to start walking.

Imagine the shock Mishka got when she walked in to find Anakin – not crawling – but _walking. _Apparently he had somehow managed to get out of his bassinet - she thought it very highly that he had managed to float his way out – and then he had started walking. So she assumed.

As excited and happy as she was, she was also furious and upset. She was furious because Anakin could have hurt himself very badly and she wouldn't have been there to help him, and she was upset because this meant he was to be sent to the other caretakers, who took care of the children when they started walking.

Mishka stared at the little boy, who was sitting happily on her lap and sucking his thumb. His blue eyes glanced towards the opposite side of the room towards the door. About a minute later it slid open. Mishka sighed; she wasn't surprised. Anakin could now sense people when they were near, and could easily pick up on their moods and manipulate their emotions. Lately though, he had started to lose the second power. It was being replaced by an irritating stubbornness to do what he wanted, and not what Mishka wanted.

"Miss Ali?"

Mishka looked up, a young handmaiden was standing at the door. She smiled and signaled to Anakin, "I'm here to pick him up."

Mishka nodded her head and blinked sadly down at Anakin – he stared up at her, picking up on her mood.

"I'm going to have to leave you now," she told him, teary-eyed, "Oh I love you Ani. Don't forget that."

Anakin cocked his head, confused by her words. He lifted a hand to grab her head tail softly, but Mishka pushed it away. "You have to go now, I'm sorry." Anakin had become a son to her, just as the other younglings had. It broke her heart every time one of them had to leave.

"I know that you'll be the greatest Jedi ever." Mishka paused and smiled at him. "Do it for me."

The handmaiden walked in and put her hand on Mishka's shoulder. "He'll be taken care of." She assured her.

Mishka blinked the tears from her eyes and forced a smile, "Of course." She said, clearing her throat. She pulled Anakin into a tight hug before kissing him on the head and handing him to the handmaiden. She wondered if this was how Knight Qui-Gon Jinn had felt when he had given Anakin to her to raise; she wondered if he had felt the same way, giving the child you had cared for to a complete stranger. She wondered if this was how all of the parents felt, giving away their Force-sensitive children.

Mishka had never felt so alone in her entire life, and she was tempted to run away with Anakin, but she banished the thoughts immediately. Of course, she would never do that; she had all of these other children to care for. All of whom she considered her children.

"Please, don't let anything happen to him." She said, handing Anakin over to her. The handmaiden smiled. "I won't. He'll be safe with us."

Mishka sighed and looked at her hands. "I know."

She still had the nagging feeling that she was giving up her child though.

…


	4. Fighting Form

**Title: **Fighting Form

…

_Nine years later…_

Anakin Skywalker fingered the dark blonde braid that trailed down to his shoulder. His dark blue eyes studied the Twi'Lek in front of him closely, and a giddy feeling rose up inside of him at the sight of her. She smiled at him and he all but melted on the spot.

About being brought from the crèche to the Jedi Temple, Anakin had accomplished many things. His first word was 'Starship', for it had been the first thing he had seen upon arriving at the temple. Even now the holographic Starship hovered above them on the ceiling, flipping and racing around the room. He had been ten months old in standard time, early for his age. Upon coming to the temple he had made a few friends, the first being Elenar'e Kilsh (though everybody called her Lena - she hated Elenar'e). He had also befriended a human boy named Ash-Ke Leighton, and a pure red Togruta with white surrounding his eyes named Shaal Tano. At the age of four, another human child had been brought to the temple. She had been found on the planet Tatooine as a slave; she still had scars on her back from where she had been whipped. Her name was Aliyah Albesh.

Each of his friends had a special place in his heart, but for some reason, whenever he looked upon Lena now, he couldn't help but to feel…different. He was acting completely weird around her. He laughed at her jokes even if they weren't funny, and stuttered when he spoke to her. It all seemed very amusing to their friends, but to Lena and Anakin, it was pure torture. Neither of them knew what to say to the other – it was…different. Anakin and Lena had always been trouble-makers, playing pranks on their teachers and the other students. Shaal and Ash-Ke had always sat in the background, just watching them and not doing anything. When Aliyah arrived, she had been wary of them at first. She had been wary at everyone; she had never been treated with kindness, and it was difficult to gain her trust, but eventually they all became friends and Aliyah would even join in on Anakin and Lena's antics once in a while.

Bright green eyes blinked at him and he realized he had been staring. "Lena I—"

Anakin started as Lena put a finger to his lips, saying "shh". Then she did something neither of them expected. She kissed him.

It was a small kiss, just a peck, but it caused the blood to rush to Anakin's cheeks and his heart to start pounding. After she pulled away he felt he had trouble breathing.

"I –" Lena looked shocked at what she had done. "I'm sorry, Anakin! I didn't…I don't…"

"Lena…" Anakin whispered, touching his lips.

"I'm sorry."

Anakin scrutinized her for a second, before breaking out in a grin. "I should be the one who's sorry." He said.

Lena looked confused. "But I –"

"Because I enjoyed it."

Lena smiled shyly at him, then her eyebrows scrunched together. "Is this normal? I mean…we're not the same species…"

"Neither is Aayla or Kit, but they manage." He said, shrugging. "Besides, it's not my fault that I'm so irresistible."

Lena gasped, "Anakin, Aayla and Kit are Jedi Masters! They wouldn't –"

"They would. I caught them holding hands." Anakin said, grinning.

Lena looked at a loss for words, then she smiled. "I guess that means we're safe then."

"I guess so," he stroked her cheek, then let his hand fall back to his side.

"You know…the trials are coming up soon. To see if we'll become a Jedi or not…" he said conversationally. Lena looked at the ground. "I know." She said.

Anakin took in her expression and exclaimed, "Lena you can't honestly be thinking you won't do good! You're an amazing swordsman!"

"Oh I know…it's just…" she broke off, looking hesitantly in the other direction.

"It's just what?" Anakin prompted. She looked back up at him, her eyes wide. "It's just…if one of us doesn't get chosen, we'll go to the 'Corps and have no contact whatsoever! But if we both prevail…we might not want to see each other again…"

Anakin lifted her chin up, "I'll always want to see you." He promised, and as an after-thought added, "Even if you don't want me to."

"I want you to." Lena said enthusiastically.

"Good, cause I wasn't planning on leaving you alone anyways. Soon, you'll get very, VERY sick of my presence." He grinned sheepishly.

Lena laughed, "Don't count on it."

…

"Ani, relax."

"I can't!" Anakin exclaimed, much to Shaal's annoyance and Ash-Ke's amusement.

"Oh you think this is funny!" Anakin demanded harshly, turning to look at Ash-Ke. The black-haired boy stared at him before bursting into a new fit of laughter, "Y-Yes!" he finally sputtered out.

Anakin scowled and turned away, fingering his braid nervously.

"You need to relax!" Shaal snapped.

"Oh easy for you to say!" Anakin snapped back.

"Anakin what the kriff are you talking about! You're the best swordsman in the class!"

Anakin frowned. "I forgot to memorize the code." He mumbled.

Shaal and Ash-Ke stared at him in shock, "…what?" Shaal finally managed.

"I forget the code."Anakin said gruffly.

"Oh this isn't good…okay…breath Anakin, alright, here's the code:

_There is no emotion, there is peace." _

"There is no emotion, there is peace." Anakin repeated.

"_There is no ignorance, there is knowledge." _

"There is no ignorance, there is knowledge."

"_There is no passion, there is serenity." _

"There is no passion, there is serenity."

"_There is no chaos, there is—" _

"Who's the brainiac who came up with these anyways?" Ash-Ke inserted. Anakin and Shaal turned to glare at him before Shaal restated,

"_There is no chaos, there is harmony." _

"There is no chaos, there is harmony."

"_There is no death, there is the Force." _

"There is no death, there is the Force."

Anakin took a deep breath and looked at Shaal and Ash-Ke. "Think you got it?" Shaal asked.

"I think so, hold on…There is no peace, there is emotion…no wait that's not right. Okay – there is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is…awareness? No…no it's knowledge right? And then…"

Shaal and Ash-Ke both groaned in frustration. This was going to be a long day. Deciding to ignore Anakin's attempts, Shaal informed Ash-Ke, "The "brainiac" who came up with this code was called Odan-Urr." Ash-Ke didn't seem to care much though.

…

"There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no chaos, there is harmony. There is no death, there is the Force." Anakin took a deep breath and looked at the Council, who were nodding at each other.

"Very good, young Skywalker." Master Windu said. "Now, tell me what you see."

He held something up, and out of nowhere an image appeared in Anakin's mind. "A uh – orange…no yellow Starship." Another image forced its way into Anakin's mind. "A pod-racer." "A Bantha." "A green lightsaber." "A black speeder." "Is that a Noobian ship?" Anakin asked the last question. Mace Windu sighed and put the object down, "You got them all right. You can proceed to the next level."

Master Yoda spoke up, "What partner, have you?"

"Len – uh, Elenar'e Kilsh."

Yoda nodded, "Which form, you use?"

"Form V."

"Why chose this, have you?"

Anakin frowned. "The first thing that caught my attention was that it was a very respected form…well…by most people that is. I looked into it, and I found out that a few people were actually offended by the form. Some people thought of it as dominating others, which it COULD be used in that way, but only if you will it to. I wouldn't use it for that, only if it were to my advantage. It's less passive than form three, and more powerful than most other forms. The best part is that if the chance occurs and I use the right footing, I can switch forms to Form IV and Form III."

Master Yoda nodded again, "Right, your motives are. Proceed to the hall, you shall." Anakin bowed and left with a quick, 'thank you Masters'. Once he got outside the Council chambers he was immediately bombarded by his friends, who had all passed the tests.

"Did you do it!" Ash-Ke asked, while at the same time Shaal asked, "Did you remember the words to the code?"

"Yes, yes." Anakin said. Aliyah gave an excited whoop, "I KNEW IT!" she exclaimed, then lowered her voice and signaled to Lena, who was leaning against the wall. "She was worried you wouldn't make it."

"Well if you'll excuse me I'll go quench those worries." He said, smiling slightly. Aliyah smiled back and moved to talk to Ash-Ke and Shaal. Anakin walked with a purpose to Lena, and pulled her into a hug. "I made it!" he exclaimed, Lena smiled.

"I'm glad, I didn't think anyone else could be much of a competition." She remarked.

"Self-conceited much?"

"No, just aware of my awesome skills."

Anakin laughed, and after a while Lena joined in.

"Shall we?" Anakin asked, and Shaal looked up at him. "Did you call me?" he asked, confused. Anakin burst out laughing, and Lena explained, "No, he said 'shall' as in should, not Shaal like your name."

"Oh," Shaal said, observing Anakin who was practically rolling on the floor clutching his stomach.

"Arrogant little…" Shaal mumbled something else in his own language then walked away, Ash-Ke and Aliyah close behind him.

…

Qui-Gon leaned forward in his seat, watching intently as Anakin and a blue Twi'Lek circled each other, activating their "lightsabers", which were really just borrowed and on low settings so they couldn't hurt each other.

Anakin smirked and said something to the blue Twi'Lek, who answered by slashing her lightsaber around her middle, daring him to make the first move. Apparently, he decided to.

Qui-Gon's eyes barely managed to keep up with the two younglings, who seemed to be battling with all of their hearts. Sparks ignited whenever they clashed their sabers, confirming just how much power and energy they were putting behind the blows. The Twi'Lek pounced next to Anakin and was about to thrust her saber into his middle when Anakin side-stepped her and jumped straight overtop of her. Qui-Gon was surprised, not many younglings could handle Form IV. He seemed to have been using Forms V and III the most, much to his advantage. The Twi'Lek was alternating between Forms I and III.

After about a half-an-hour of a heavy duel Anakin finally managed to knock the lightsaber straight out of Lena's hands and Force-kicked her to the ground, where she lay panting. He held his lightsaber to her throat, and she acknowledged the defeat with a small nod of her head. The crowd erupted into cheers, and Anakin smiled and deactivated his lightsaber. He held out his hand and she gladly took it, even giving him a friendly smile. They said something to each other and Qui-Gon assumed it was a 'good job' or 'you fought well'.

Qui-Gon made his decision…oh how Obi-Wan would kill him…

…


	5. Not all fun

**Chapter: **Not that fun

…

"…You mean you're not mad?" Obi-Wan asked, surprised. Qui-Gon chuckled and sad, "A Jedi doesn't get mad."

"Yes Mas—Qui-Gon, I know that…it's just…I was sure you would have thought it would be too soon for me."

Qui-Gon put a comforting hand on the young man's shoulder. "Obi-Wan, I believe you are capable of anything. I thought you would be mad at me, as a matter of fact."

Obi-Wan was confused, "Forgive me Master, but why would I be mad at you?"

"Qui-Gon," Qui-Gon corrected, then said, "I have taken on a Padawan myself."

Obi-Wan stared at him for a moment, open-mouthed, before snapping it shut and saying, "It's that boy isn't it? Anakin Skywalker."

Qui-Gon nodded, "Yes it is. How did you know?"

"I could literally feel the Force calling out to me, and it was originating from the boy. It doesn't really surprise me that you took him on."

"Well, it surprises me that you took the girl on. She seemed a little too…feisty, for your tastes."

Obi-Wan smiled, "I thought it would be interesting to get an opposite from me. We could teach each other, instead of just one-way."

Qui-Gon nodded, "That's wise of you, young one."

Suddenly Obi-Wan went rigid, "There they are." He said, inclining his head to where two small figures were approaching them. Qui-Gon watched in amusement as the little Twi'Lek and Anakin skidded to a halt in front of them, looking frantic.

"Are you Masters Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon?" the Twi'Lek asked them. Qui-Gon smiled, "Yes we are. I'm Qui-Gon, this is Obi-Wan. I'm assuming you are our new Padawans?"

Both Anakin and Lena beamed at the word 'padawan'. "Yes, I'm Anakin…and that means…you're my Master Qui-Gon?" Anakin asked, looking up at the said person.

"I suppose," Qui-Gon said smiling, "Come, let's get you settled in the new quarters. Obi-Wan, I suggest you do the same with your new padawan." Qui-Gon spoke to his former apprentice. Obi-Wan nodded, "I will Qui-Gon," then he looked at Lena. "You must be Elenar'e, you did good out there."

Lena's voice was reproachful, but there was a ghost of a smile on her face. "I prefer Lena, and thank you Master."

"I'll have to remember that than…"

Obi-Wan's words became incomprehensible to Anakin as him and Qui-Gon walked further away, down an empty corridor.

"So Anakin," Qui-Gon said, making small talk. "How do you think your trial went?"

"Well - I suppose…but you're asking me how I _felt _rather than the obvious aren't you?"

Qui-Gon smiled, "I _suppose _that I am."

Anakin paused to think, "Well…it was…scary at first," he gave a nervous chuckle, "I remember how my friends were yelling at me because I was freaking out. I uh, well…I sort of forgot my Jedi Code lines…"

"Was it because you were nervous? Or you didn't study?"

"Well I…didn't…study…"

Qui-Gon nodded, "You'll have to be more thoughtful under my apprenticeship Padawan."

"Yes Master."

"Good. We're here." He said, stopping. Anakin narrowed his eyes and read the nameplate, it said, 'Jinn/Skywalker', he got a funny feeling in his stomach and was suddenly nervous. He had anticipated this day ever since he found out what a Jedi was – he couldn't wait to begin.

…

Being a Padawan, Anakin decided, was not what he had made it out to be. He'd figured they'd start training with lightsabers every day; Qui-Gon thought differently. The first thing they'd do is get up early to meditate. After that they'd eat breakfast; after breakfast was Anakin's favorite part of the day – lightsaber practice. It was clear that Qui-Gon was very good with a lightsaber, and Anakin had yet to defeat him in a duel. Once they finished dueling, they both had free time to do whatever they wanted (Anakin usually stole this time to continue with his lightsaber moves) and by the end of the day they meditated again.

Anakin just couldn't seem to get the hang of it. He was impatient to start his lightsaber practice, and even though their bond wasn't too strong yet, Qui-Gon could sense in the Force Anakin's growing frustration. He opened his eyes and raised an eyebrow at Anakin. "Having trouble young one?"

"No," Anakin lied, then frowned. "Yes. I'm never going to get this right. Whenever I try meditating I think about something else!"

Qui-Gon looked thoughtful. "Anakin, how have you been meditating?"

Anakin cocked his head to the side, "What do you mean?"

"I mean, do you focus on one thing, or do you expand your mind?"

"Er…?" Anakin wasn't sure which answer would be best, so he answered honestly. "I don't really focus on anything. My mind keeps wandering."

Qui-Gon didn't look mad like Anakin had been expecting. He looked rather pleased that Anakin had told him this. "I figured it was something like that. You're less experienced then I thought you would be," he said, more to himself then to Anakin. Though it wasn't meant to be an insult, Anakin bristled anyway. "I'm experienced!" he exclaimed heatedly. "I'm good with a lightsaber – I can beat any padawan!"

Qui-Gon looked amused. "I'm sure you can."

Anakin glared at him suspiciously, not really sure if he was being sarcastic or honestly genuine. "Well, I can." He repeated in a firm voice.

"I'm more worried about your meditation." Qui-Gon said after a while. "You let your thoughts wander. You must keep them focused on the Here and Now."

Anakin nodded sullenly, "Yes Master."

"You need to learn this in order to become a Jedi," Qui-Gon continued. Anakin perked up at the thought of being a Jedi. "Yes Master!" he said with more enthusiasm. "I'll try harder, Master!"

Qui-Gon smiled and sat up. "Come now, it's time for breakfast."

…

"I'm telling you, they act like meditation is the most important part of being a Jedi," said Aliyah scathingly. Anakin had to agree with her. Many months had passed, but Anakin still managed to make time for some of his friends. It seems like the only padawan that he never saw was Lena. After a while he'd learned to stop asking about her. She was too focused on her studies. She had no time for friendship; least of all with Anakin. The thought put him in a bad mood.

"Qui-Gon won't let me eat or go to sleep until I have it mastered," Anakin complained. "It's not fair. He's been meditating all his life."

"Meditating isn't all that bad," Shaal said, shrugging. "I personally find it very easy."

"It's different for you," mumbled Anakin. "You've always been good at it."

Shaal gave him a very serious look. "You'd better learn to be good at it," he said slowly, "because you'll never be a good Jedi without being able to meditate."

"Is that what Surenit told you?" Aliyah interjected before Anakin could speak his mind.

Shaal straightened himself. "Yes. Unlike some people, I actually listen to my master."

Aliyah frowned. "I listen to my master," she said. "I just don't like meditating."

"Exactly," said Anakin passionately. By now, Shaal was starting to look annoyed. "Lightsabers don't make a Jedi!" he growled.

"You're right," Anakin said very seriously. "Blasters always help too."

Aliyah giggled and Shaal glared at him. "Oh, you know what I meant."

Anakin gave him an innocent smile, causing Shaal to roll his eyes. "Our free time is almost over," said Anakin suddenly. Shaal and Aliyah both groaned.

"Kriff! I was having fun too!" Aliyah exclaimed crossly.

Just at that moment, Anakin spotted a blue Twil'lek running towards them, her long headtails bouncing as she loped over to him gracefully. He met her green eyes and his heartbeat sped up. She skidded to a halt next to them. "Hey," she said, sounding very out of breath.

"Hi," said Anakin quickly. "We were just about to leave."

"Oh," Lena looked downcast. "Right."

"We can stay for a little while longer," said Aliyah, glancing between the two of them with an odd smile.

Lena's face lit up. "Really?"

"Of course!" said Aliyah, while at the same time Shaal said, "Actually, my Master is expecting me. Goodbye."

Lena's smile slid off her face. Once he was out of hearing Lena turned to them.

"He's mad at me, isn't he?"

Truth was, Anakin was a little mad at her too. "Well, it would be nice to see you every now and again," he said shortly. Lena sighed and looked down. "I'm sorry. I've missed talking to you guys – but it's just… Master Obi-Wan keeps me busy."

Anakin didn't bother responding. Aliyah, on the other hand, responded with much enthusiasm. "I know what you mean," she said sympathetically. "Master Neesha always tries to take up my time!"

"You still manage to meet with us though," pointed out Anakin, purposefully looking away from Lena. He couldn't bare the sight of her; not only was he angry, but he was scared about his emotions.

Lena's headtails drooped and Aliyah turned to glare at Anakin. "It's not her fault," she said. Anakin couldn't believe what he was hearing. Aliyah was siding with Lena now?

Anakin was about to say something he probably would have regretted later, had Jedi Master Neesha Kalsh not walked in at that exact moment. "Master!" exclaimed Aliyah, waving her over. Neesha didn't waste any time in getting to them. Her brown cloak billowed behind her as she speed-walked towards them.

"Greetings young ones," she said, nodding to Anakin and Lena.

"Greetings," said Lena respectfully, and Anakin replied likewise.

"Aliyah, I've been looking all over for you," Neesha said, her tone scolding. Aliyah bowed her head, "Sorry, Master. I forgot to tell you I was meeting with my friends."

Neesha frowned at the word 'friends', but she didn't look angry. "It's time we leave," she said, "you still need to do your homework."

Aliyah wrinkled her nose but didn't make any other comment as she followed after her master. "Bye!" she called out to Anakin and Lena.

"Bye!" Lena exclaimed. "I hope to see you soon!"

"Bye Aliyah," Anakin said loudly, then turned to Lena. For a moment there was complete silence, and then Lena cleared her throat. "I'm really sorry I haven't been talking with you guys lately."

"It's fine," said Anakin, a little too quickly. Lena's brows furrowed, but Anakin couldn't quite make out the emotion on her dark blue face. "I'd hoped you wouldn't be mad at me," she said softly. "I really want us to be friends again."

Anakin ran a hand through his tangled hair. "Well, we'll see how that works out," he said. "I have to go. My Master will be expecting me."

Then he turned and walked away, leaving Lena standing by herself.


	6. Meeting Padme

**Chapter:** Meeting Padme

_10 years later_

…

Lena hadn't attempted to make any contact with Anakin, and Anakin made no attempt to contact her. He'd watch her from a distance sometimes, but other than that he usually ignored her. He managed to keep up with Ash-Ke, Aliyah and most of the time Shaal. Contrary to what Anakin had suspected, they'd become even closer as the time flew by. Aliyah still liked keeping contact with Lena – the two could be seen talking on countless occasions in the great halls. Anakin wanted no participation, no matter how much Aliyah begged him to come with them. His presence would be unwelcome. Ash-Ke, on the other hand, seemed to be content to go wherever Aliyah was, and she seemed to enjoy his company even more than Lena's.

Right now Anakin was sitting in a ship, his master Qui-Gon sitting next to him. Across the room Lena's master, Obi-Wan, was standing with his arms crossed, staring at the stars. Anakin could tell from his pale parlor that he was not one for flying. Qui-Gon on the other hand, seemed to have no problem with it. He and Anakin got along well; though Anakin wasn't sure if it was considered attachment or not. He'd never been this close to anybody in his life before, not even his friends. He didn't know his mother, so that didn't count. He had no father, as he'd been reminded on countless occasions from his rival padawans. It bothered him more than it should. He was different; he didn't fit in. In fact, he was starting to suspect that the only reason he was still in contact with Shaal, Aliyah and Ash-Ke was the fact that he was "The Chosen One". Anakin sighed and leaned back in his chair. Qui-Gon turned to look at him. "Something wrong, Padawan?"

Anakin chose his words carefully, and when he said them it was in a murmur so that only Qui-Gon could hear. Or so he thought. He was completely unaware that Obi-Wan was listening intently to every word he was saying. "I'm not what people thought I was."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I'm not… the Chosen One. I don't feel it. I know that I'm not normal – but I don't think that I'm _that _un-normal." He sighed. "I think that my friends only like me because that's who they believe I am. I think the only one who sees the truth is Le – Elenar'e. That's why she doesn't talk to me."

Silence. Complete and utter silence.

"You don't believe that, do you Ani?" Qui-Gon asked, using a nickname that he hadn't used since Anakin was ten.

Anakin turned a shade of pink, "I don't know," he said. "I don't know what to believe anymore."

"Listen to me, Anakin. Listen well. I've seen you with your friends – ever since you were in the crèche. You've always been happy with them, and they with you. They were your friends before people believed you to be the Chosen One. To them, you're Anakin Skywalker, their friend that they've known since before they could walk."

Anakin stayed silent. Qui-Gon sighed, "Anakin, do you think that Master Obi-Wan treats me differently because you are my apprentice?"

Anakin gave him a disbelieving stare, "No! Of course not!"

"And why is that?"

"Because he was your padawan and – oh…" Anakin trailed off, looking sheepish. Qui-Gon smiled and even Obi-Wan's lip twitched upwards.

"Do you understand now?"

Anakin nodded slowly, looking thoughtful. "I think I do."

"Good." And then it was settled. For the remainder of the trip Anakin felt very appeased.

…

"Here we are," spoke the pilot. "Naboo is straight ahead." Anakin jumped out of his seat, excited. He'd only been on six missions before, and they had all been full of action and suspense. He hoped this would be the same.

The planet was beautiful, Anakin had to admit it, but his excitement was diminished when Lena came in the room. Of course, she was Obi-Wan's apprentice, so it was to be expected she'd be on the mission as well, but it didn't stop Anakin from wanting to flee into the opposite room until she left. She didn't stop walking until she was right next to him, and he stiffened. If she noticed this, she decided to ignore it. From the opposite end of the room, Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon watched the two apprentices apprehensively.

"Lena," Anakin said awkwardly.

"Hello, Anakin."

Her soft voice made Anakin want to vomit and hug her at the same time. He turned to look at her. Though she was still beautiful, she was of no attraction to him anymore. He wondered if she felt the same way. "How are you?"

Lena didn't say anything for a moment. "I've been well… have you been keeping up with your lightsaber practice?"

Anakin suddenly grinned. "You bet. I must be at least ten times stronger than you now."

Lena let out a snort. "Right. I bet I could take you on one hundred times and beat you at every duel."

Anakin rolled his eyes, "Sure you could."

"I could!" Lena exclaimed, her eyes bright. "I'll prove it to you!"

Anakin turned to her, amused. "Oh yes? How?"

"We can have a duel," Lena said simply. Anakin thought about this. A duel WOULD be a nice way to let out his emotions…

"Fine."

He thought he'd never seen Lena look so happy and confused at the same time.

…

"It's hot on this planet," complained Anakin. Lena looked at him from the corner of her eye, "says the boy who came from Tatooine."

"That's different," said Anakin flippantly. "I was only born there, not raised – and I'm not a boy anymore. I'm twenty!"

"I'm sorry, O wise one. I had no clue you were that ancient."

Anakin glared, "I'm still older than you!"

Lena looked offended. "Only by a year!"

"Yeah yeah…"

They stopped once they reached a large, beautiful castle. Lena's eyes sparkled when she saw it. "What would I give to live here," she breathed.

Anakin scrunched up his nose, "It's pretty." He said, "but I've yet to see anything that makes me want to stay."

"How about that?" said Lena, pointing towards the side of the elegant room they had just entered. Anakin blinked quickly, following where she had been pointing. A beautiful girl, maybe a bit older than him, was standing in the corner. She was wearing an orange and yellow flowing handmaiden dress, wearing it like a veil over her head, covering her hair. He could still see her face though. She had beautiful, wide brown eyes, and smooth, clear skin. "She's nice…" he concluded, turning away. Lena looked at him, clearly confused. "What?"

"She – oh," Anakin then realized she'd been pointing to the wall, where a large mosaic of different space cruisers were painted. "Right – that's what I meant."

Lena had already spotted the girl though, and rolled her eyes. "Boys…"

Anakin didn't bother to correct her on his age.

…

Anakin yawned as the political discussions went on. Lena was looking equally as bored, but Anakin had his eyes on one particular handmaiden. The Queen's voice was starting to annoy him.

The handmaiden caught his eye and gave him a small smile before turning to look back at the scene. "If you'd stop mooning," Lena said crossly, and Anakin turned his attention to her. "You might want to pay attention to this."

Anakin looked to where his master and the Queen of Naboo were discussing politics… again.

"My Lady, what do you propose we do?"

The Queen was looking lost, and also panicked. For a moment she seemed to consider something; Anakin noticed she shot a quick glance at the handmaiden he found so captivating. "We shall sign a treaty then," she said, her voice sounding weak.

For a moment nobody spoke, and then the handmaiden walked in front of her. There was a murmur of surprise – this was a bold and rude act. After all, she was simply a handmaiden, what did she have to do with any of this?

"No," she said, pulling her veil off. Long, dark brown braided hair hung down her back, sleek and shiny.

"No?" questioned Qui-Gon. "Young handmaiden –"

"I'm no handmaiden," said the girl with authority. "_I _am Queen Amidala. This is my decoy," she motioned towards the Queen – no, decoy; "and also my most loyal servant."

The whole room let out collective gasps. "Is this true?" asked one of the guards to the false-Queen. She nodded, "It is indeed true. My Lady, I apologize. I wasn't sure what you would have chosen –"

"It is fine," said the true Queen. "You have done a wonderful job, but I think I need to step in on this particular cause. We will sign no treaty," she said, turning back to the Jedi. "I want to see it done that they do not bother my people over a contract as vile as this. If they don't stop this, then we will have to discuss a new treaty."

…

"I just can't believe it!" Anakin exclaimed for the third time. Obi-Wan had difficulty rolling his eyes. "Oh I pity you," he said to Qui-Gon, who simply chuckled. Anakin glared at the both of them, but Lena laughed.

"Oh fine! Since you're all against me anyway," Anakin muttered angrily, stalking ahead of them. Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan exchanged amused glances.

"Hey, wait up!" Anakin paused as Lena raced over to him.

"Come to laugh at me some more?"

"No," Lena said sheepishly. "Sorry about that."

"Right."

"So… you're right, I wasn't expecting her to be Queen either."

Anakin wasn't sure what to say to that, so he just resumed walking.

He stopped dead in his tracks as he spotted Queen Amidala walking towards them.

"You like her." It was no question. Anakin turned red and growled, "What's it matter to you?"

Lena didn't say anything.

Once Amidala reached them they all gave her a small bow. "My Lady," said Anakin, going one step further. He could practically hear Lena rolling her eyes.

The Queen smiled at him, and Anakin's heart rate sped up considerably. "It's a pleasure to meet you. Anakin Skywalker? And his infamous trainer, Jedi Master Jinn?"

"Yes," said Qui-Gon. "It's a pleasure to meet you as well, my Lady."

The Queen nodded. "You can call me Padme, if need be. I don't care for such formalities outside of the throne room."

Qui-Gon smiled. "Well met, Padme."

"And you…?"

"You can call me Qui-Gon," he said.

"And you may call me and my apprentice by our first names as well," Obi-Wan spoke up. "This is Lena, and I am Obi-Wan."

Padme smiled at them all. "I've heard of you all. Although, I thought your apprentice's name was Elenar'e?" she sounded confused.

"That is her name, yes, but she prefers to be called Lena."

Lena nodded and gave Padme an odd smile. Padme gave her the same smile, and Anakin felt a warning sign go off, though he wasn't sure what it meant yet.

Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon also seemed to notice something was amiss. "Ah, yes, well," Obi-Wan stuttered, "me and my padawan ought to be going."

Lena shot him a look, but didn't argue as he walked them both swiftly away towards the space shuttle. Padme watched her go with an odd spark in her eyes and then turned back to Anakin. "She'll make a good jedi."

For some reason, Anakin felt that she was trying to catch on to more than she had spoken. "Yes, a very good one," he said. "Though she isn't as skilled as I am," he couldn't help adding. Padme laughed, a clear, ringing laugh that made Anakin smile.

"You're funny, Anakin." She said, smiling at him. Anakin hadn't meant it as a joke, but if she thought it was funny then he'd pretend it was one. "Yeah, I get that sometimes," he said, still with that same smile on his face.

He heard Qui-Gon clear his throat loudly and then excuse himself. Anakin was about to follow him, but then he realized that Bail Organa had just beckoned Qui-Gon. Anakin wasn't about to get into any more political discussions, so he stayed with the Queen.

The two made small talk for a little while, when Anakin noticed that the sky was starting to turn dark. "Sorry," he apologized. "I must go find my master now."

Padme gave him an understanding smile and nodded. "Goodbye, Anakin. It was nice meeting you."

Anakin smiled back, "It was nice meeting you too."


	7. Jealousy Shows Up

"Why won't you at least talk to her?" Anakin asked Lena curiously as they walked together through the hallway. Sunlight washed over Lena, giving her the appearance of almost being a hue of dark green. "She's never come to me."

"Oh, come on. She thinks you don't appreciate her."

"I never said I didn't."

"You never said you did, either," Anakin prodded.

Lena turned to him. "Let's not talk about Padme right now."

Anakin looked confused, "Well… what _do_ you want to talk about?"

"Life," she answered simply. "It's been a long time… maybe a little too long," she said, leaning closer towards him. Anakin averted his gaze to the floor.

"Maybe," he agreed.

"So… why don't you say we…you know, catch up?" Lena suggested lightly. When Anakin turned to look at her, he noticed she was wearing an odd kind of smirk. The look unnerved him; he'd never seen Lena like this before.

"S-Sure," he stuttered. "Catch up."

Lena gave him a genuine smile and leaned even closer, so she was all but whispering in his ear. "I've missed you."

Anakin fidgeted with his hands nervously, "I uh, I missed you too."

"How much?"

"Huh?"

"How much have you missed me, Ani?"

Anakin blinked at her. Her face was extremely close to his now. "Ah – um, a lot."

"I've seen you training you know," said Lena, looking unperturbed at their closeness. "You didn't lie. You're amazing – I've never seen anybody look more graceful while maintaining dominance during a duel before."

Anakin bit back a smirk at her praise. "You've seen me training?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at her. She gave him a sheepish smile, and he was almost positive she would have been blushing had her skin not been blue. "Like I said," she spoke softly, purring in his ear, "I've missed you a lot."

Just as he was starting to feel even more uncomfortable, he noticed Padme from the corner of his eye. She was glaring at Lena with an intensity Anakin didn't even know she had in her. Lena gave her an even stare, then kissed Anakin on the cheek, taking even him by surprise. "We'll catch up later then, Ani." She said with a wave, then raced away, leaving Anakin wondering what had just happened.

…

"Ah I hate politics," Anakin said. "No offense meant, Padme."

She smiled and shook her head. "None taken."

Anakin couldn't help but to admire how her curls fell from her bun and poured to her shoulders. The sunlight turned the color a rich, golden brown. To Anakin, it seemed as though she'd gone another whole step in looking absolutely perfect. He didn't mind it.

"So, now that I've told you about my life," Padme said, "Why don't you tell me about yours?"

Anakin thought for a moment. "Well, I was born on Tatooine –"

"Tatooine?" Padme interjected, suddenly looking serious. "How were you found? They're not under the control of the Republic."

Anakin shook his head, "No, they aren't, but back when Obi-Wan was still Qui-Gon's apprentice, they crash landed on the planet. They found my mom, who was still pregnant with me. She died in childbirth… I don't even know her name…" Anakin trailed off.

Padme frowned, "That must be horrible."

Anakin shrugged, "Not many of us Jedi know their parents. I never knew my mom, it's only fair I suppose. Qui-Gon's the closest thing I have to family."

"What about your father?" Padme asked curiously. "Did you know him?"

Anakin frowned. He'd hoped she wouldn't ask this question. "No," he said. "I don't have a dad."

Padme obviously didn't take his meaning literally. He'd said it in such a way that it _couldn't _be taken literally. "Sorry, for whatever happened," she said softly. Anakin leaned against the wall, "Ah, it's nothing."

"What about growing up?" Padme prodded. "What's life like in the Jedi Temple?"

Anakin didn't even need to think about it. "It's nice," he said, "It's real nice. Well, for the most part anyway," he added sourly.

Padme frowned, "What's the other part?"

"Just… some of the other padawans and me don't get along. They're jealous," he decided. Padme didn't say anything, she just looked at him with her warm brown eyes. "From what I've heard you're good with a lightsaber."

"Yeah, I guess," he said with a flippant grin. "I'm not Master Yoda or anything when it comes to dueling, but…"

"You should let me see you practice sometime," said Padme, smiling. "I'm going to be going to the Jedi Temple with you."

"Ah – woah wait, what?" Anakin stuttered. "_You're _going to the Temple?"

Padme laughed lightly, "Why are you so surprised, Anakin? I've given up my role as Queen."

Anakin stared at her incomprehensibly. "But… I don't understand… how do you just give it up?"

"You're imagining it from a Jedi's point of view," Padme said, playing with one of her ringlets. "I've been Queen of Naboo for far too long. My time has run up, and elections have come to a draw. I've taken out any nomination I have. Therefore, when the voting begins, I won't be there for it. I've been promised a job at the Senate."

"So… you're coming back to Coruscant with us?" asked Anakin, still confused.

"Yes, I am. I'm not sure if we'll be seeing too much of each other there though," she added, giving him an odd look.

"Well why not?" Anakin said, determination etching his features. "You're there, I'm there. Why won't we be able to see each other?"

Padme sighed, "Daily interaction between a Senator and a Jedi isn't allowed – you should know that."

"But I –" he trailed off, suddenly realizing what she was getting at. "You're right, it was foolish of me to believe otherwise."

He turned away from her, knowing that he shouldn't even be considering her as somebody close to him. He let himself get attached too easily, and one day it was going to be his downfall.

"Anakin," Padme grabbed his arm. "I still want to see you, you know."

Anakin gave her a light smile. "Then see me."

After that he left, leaving Padme to mull over what he'd said.


	8. AshKe's Time

**Chapter: **Ash-Ke's time

…

Padme had been right. Anakin rarely was able to see her, much less talk to her. Though he hadn't known her for a long time, he felt an aching on those rare occasions that he spotted her. Right now Anakin was staring at her from afar. She was standing with the rest of the Senators in a circle; most likely discussing some political debate that had nothing to do with him. Still, he wished for only a moment that he were one of those Senators, if only because he wanted to be able to talk to Padme. This new obsession of wanting to see her was starting to scare Anakin something awful. He didn't think he'd ever felt this way about anybody before, even Lena. Lena apparently had a vendetta against Padme, though Anakin had no clue why. She started talking to Anakin more, but whenever she did there was an odd glint in her eye. Anakin could tell that there was no spark between them anymore, but for some reason Lena was fooling herself into thinking that she still had an attraction for Anakin.

"Anakin!" the voice was so full of alarm and a desperate sadness it made Anakin want to cry without even knowing why. A sudden rush in the Force brought a wave of anguish crashing over him, and he shuddered. By the time he turned around to locate the source of the noise he was almost knocked over as Aliyah threw herself into his arms. She buried her face into his shoulder, sobbing hysterically. Anakin's mind was on an overload. "Aliyah… what…?"

"He – He's dead," she sobbed with a small hiccup. "He's…gone… forever…"

"What? Who?" Anakin demanded, grabbing her shoulders and pulling her away from him. He tried looking at her face, but she had her head hung low. Her dark locks were falling in front of her eyes, though Anakin could see tears streaming down her cheeks.

"A-A-" she started a whole new fit of crying. Anakin wasn't sure what to do. He'd never been good with crying girls before.

"Anakin…" a new voice from behind him made him jump. He twisted to see Shaal standing there. He looked even more subdued then Anakin had ever seen him before. His lip was trembling slightly, but he kept his voice steady. "Ash-Ke and Master Shayle Le'ta are dead."

For a moment, none of the words computed with Anakin. Ash-Ke and dead didn't go in the same sentence together. He shook his head and backed away from Shaal and Aliyah. This was some sort of sick joke; Ash-Ke couldn't be dead. He just couldn't be.

"Why would you say that?" Anakin growled, trying to keep his own voice steady. No matter how hard he tried to believe that they were lying, he could sense the truth behind their words. "Don't ever say that!"

"Anakin…" Shaal tried talking over Aliyah's loud sobs. "Listen… he's d-dead… the mission they were on…" Shaal couldn't seem to go on, so Aliyah picked up for him, screaming hysterically, "The ship blew up!"

Anakin felt as though someone had punched him in the heart. "Blew up…?" he ran a shaky hand through his hair, brushing his bangs off of his face. His vision clouded and he blinked rapidly, trying to hold back his tears. "I don't believe it. I can't."

There was complete silence; the only thing that could be heard was Aliyah's unrelenting crying. Anakin shook his head again and backed up some more. This wasn't happening. Ash-Ke couldn't be dead… with that thought in mind Anakin turned tail and ran. He wasn't sure where he was running, he just knew he needed to escape the suffocating truth. Maybe if he ran far enough, he'd be able to escape the pain of losing his best friend. If he ran fast enough, Ash-Ke would be alive and they'd have a big laugh. He pushed past padawans and jedi alike, ignoring their protests, and ran with tears streaming down his cheeks. Just when he was about to fall from exhaustion he crashed straight into somebody. He was knocked backwards, and would have hit the floor had the person not caught him just in time. He felt soft arms wrap around him and he cried into them, not caring who it was. When he looked up he saw Obi-Wan Kenobi's face swim into view. He couldn't quite make out the expression on his face, but somehow he could sense that Obi-Wan knew exactly why he was crying into his arms.

As though just aware of that fact, Anakin pulled away and muttered an apology, trying to wipe away his tears. Obi-Wan shook his head, "Don't apologize young one. Come, Qui-Gon is waiting for you." At the sound of Qui-Gon's name Anakin burst into more tears. He was completely humiliated at how his body was reacting, but at the same time all he wanted was the comfort of his master. His master would make everything better. He always did.

Anakin trailed behind Obi-Wan, who kept a firm watch on the distraught boy. Although attachment was forbidden, Obi-Wan knew exactly what the boy was going through. One of his own friends had been killed back when he was a padawan, and he'd taken the loss extremely hard. Anakin seemed to be faring no better than he did at the time.

"Anakin!" Anakin's head shot up at the sound of his master's voice, and he raced straight towards the open arms that welcomed him. "M-Master, he's dead…!"

"I know… I know…" Qui-Gon had Anakin in a tight hug, letting the boy sob. "I was just informed. I'm so sorry, Ani."

Anakin's body shook as he tried to take control again. His tears were starting to subside, but the anguish in his mind had yet to lessen. He doubted it ever would.

The image of Ash-Ke swam into his mind and he let himself get lost in thoughts of their many moments spent together. Qui-Gon rubbed his back as Anakin cried himself out. Once the tears were completely gone, and the sobs stopped racking his body, Qui-Gon let him go. Anakin was still shaking as he turned to see if Obi-Wan was still there. He wasn't. Anakin supposed he had gone to comfort his own padawan, Lena. "Come," Qui-Gon whispered and Anakin followed him into their quarters. As soon as they got there Anakin took a deep breath, trying to stop himself from shaking. His whole world felt like it was going to crash and burn around him. Ash-Ke was dead.

He'd never see him again.

The thought made Anakin want to cry again, but he had no more tears to spare. Instead he just looked at Qui-Gon sadly, who was bustling around the kitchen. It took Anakin a moment to realize he was making tea.

Anakin let out a hysterical laugh, which Qui-Gon seemed to ignore. Only Qui-Gon would think of making tea at a time like this…

…

_Ten days later_

"Do you think she'll get any better?" Anakin murmured to Shaal, who shook his head, not answering.

Anakin sighed as Lena approached them from inside Aliyah and Obi-Wan's quarters. Her wide green eyes were filled with sadness. "Is she feeling any better?" he questioned her straight away. Ever since the death of Ash-Ke, Aliyah had become unresponsive and secluded. Whenever he saw her, her mind would be elsewhere, complete anguish flooding through her whole being. "She's worse," Lena said sadly. "I wish there was something we could do to help her…"

"I wish that too," Shaal said with a sigh. "I knew she was close to him, but never this close… I think…"

Lena and Anakin turned to look at him curiously, "You think what?"

"I think she might have been in love with him," he said quickly. Anakin and Lena exchanged a look. "She may have been," Lena agreed. "She talked about him all the time."

"Did she?" Anakin had thought he was close to Aliyah, but apparently she didn't trust him enough to tell him this. At this point, and with these circumstances, he could hardly care about that. He just wanted her to get better.

"Maybe we should ask her."

"Do you think she'd admit it, though?" Lena asked. "After all, this is a tough time for her. His death has affected her the most out of all of us."

There was silence as the trio decided what they should do. "I think…" Anakin said slowly, "we wait for her to come to us. If we try prodding her, she'll just sink deeper into her shell."

Lena and Shaal stared at him for a moment, and color flooded Anakin's cheeks. "What?" he asked grumpily.

"We're just a little surprised that you actually said something wise for once," Shaal said. Anakin couldn't tell if he was serious or not. "Right… so what are we going to do?"

"I agree with Anakin," said Lena, and Shaal nodded. "Me too."

"So we're all agreed?"

"Agreed," they both said.

…

It took a few, very slow weeks, but eventually Aliyah came to them. She was even paler than usual, and her pristine eyes were very wary. She cleared her throat and the three of them looked at her expectantly.

"Guys…" she started shakily, then tried regaining her composure. "I have something to tell you."

They all waited for her to gather her courage. When she finally admitted it, it came out fast and in a jumble: "Ilovedashke."

As though sensing that her words made no sense, she spoke them more directly. "I was in love with Ash-Ke," she whispered. She looked up at them, as though scared of their reactions.

They, however, simply gave her sad smiles. "We knew," said Lena softly. Aliyah's eyebrows knit together and confusion gathered in her eyes. "You…knew?"

"We figured it out a couple of weeks ago," said Anakin. "I'm sorry…"

"Oh…" Aliyah was at a loss for words. She seemed to struggle with something for a moment, and then opened her mouth to start speaking again. "I know I haven't been talking to you guys lately – to anybody really, it's just… I feel so lost…" she trailed off, tears threatening to gather in her eyes. Shaal walked over and wrapped one russet arm around her. "You don't need to ask our forgiveness," he said firmly. "You're our friend; but you aren't alone. We all lost somebody. Let us help you."

Aliyah stared at the ground for a moment before straightening and taking a deep breath. "You're right. Thank you for being there guys… it means a lot to me."

Lena couldn't seem to hold herself back anymore. With a squeal she threw herself at Aliyah and pulled her into a tight hug. "We're so glad to have you back, Aliyah."

Aliyah didn't look surprised, but did seem a little uncomfortable. "I'm glad to be back."


	9. Duel of the Fates

**Chapter:** Duel of the Fates

…

As time passed, Ash-Ke's death became less and less anguishing. It was almost a year later, and though Anakin would never forget him, he realized that he had to let go if he were going to become the jedi he was meant to become. Shaal seemed to think in the same way as him, preferring to keep his company with another young Togruta girl named Karal Nik, but Lena refused to let go. Surprisingly, Aliyah seemed the most determined to forget him. Anakin spent most of his time talking to Padme. It was a lot easier getting her alone then he'd originally thought. There was no more following after her or watching from a distance. He talked to her whenever he wanted, and she seemed more than willing to talk with him. The only problem was they had to meet in secret. Anakin didn't like it much, but Padme seemed keen to be avoided by anybody from the Senate.

They had become so close during the year that Anakin was certain they had become a lot more than just friends. It was like Lena all over again, but Anakin felt a certain bond towards Padme that he'd never felt with Lena. He felt as though it were his destiny to fall in love with Padme. Usually, he hated the thought of destiny, but when he was with Padme all of those thoughts vanished to be replaced with a blissful peace and sense of closeness with her.

Right now Anakin was standing in an empty classroom, not quite sure how he'd gotten there. The room was grey and had big black pillars all around it. He half expected a whole herd of students to be behind one of them without his notice. He reached out with the Force, but the only thing he could sense was himself and… Aliyah?

He whipped around. Aliyah was standing there, looking almost as surprised as he was. She straightened and gave him a soft smile. Her extremely wavy black hair was slightly longer than he remembered. It hung just a little below her shoulders and blended in with her black jedi attire. He gave her a smile back and a small nod. "Fancy meeting you here, Aliyah."

"I could say the same to you," Aliyah said with a shrug. "What are you doing here?"

"I got lost… what are YOU doing here?"

Aliyah blushed, "I wanted to practice with my lightsaber. I'm supposed to be meditating right now but… well, you remember how I feel about that," she muttered. Anakin remembered the discussion they'd had when complaining about meditating. Ash-Ke had been there. Lena hadn't.

"Do you want to practice with me?" Anakin suggested. "I haven't sparred with anyone other than Qui-Gon in a while."

Aliyah grinned. "I'd like that."

Anakin nodded, and without warning flipped towards her. She easily side-stepped him and activated her lightsaber just as he activated his. Violet and blue blades smashed together as they exchanged blows. Anakin switched his Forms around, mostly for fun rather than for the sake of the battle, while Aliyah kept her Form the same. Anakin was slowly losing the higher ground. It became apparent to him that Aliyah was most likely the toughest opponent he'd ever gone against. He had to dodge her blows faster, and the weaker he became, the stronger she became. Sweat was beading down both of their faces, but they still exchanged blows and parries as though they were fighting a real battle. It didn't take long for Anakin to realize that this was her way of letting out her pain of losing Ash-Ke. He wasn't entirely sure if that was allowed or not, but the fact still remained that she was winning. He lifted his lightsaber to parry yet another blow, when she kicked him hard in the chest. He went flying against the wall and slid onto the floor, trying to regain his breathing. Before he could so much as take a breath he felt a hot sensation close to his neck. He glanced down to see Aliyah's violet lightsaber there. For a moment he was baffled. He'd never lost against a padawan before; especially not Aliyah.

Anakin looked up at her. He was suddenly seeing her in a new light. She was no longer the slave on Tatooine, who'd been brought to the temple with whip marks on her back. She was no longer the girl who played pranks before they were padawans. She was no longer the girl who had fallen in love with Ash-Ke. She was a jedi. She was strong and powerful, yet graceful and determined. A newfound respect bubbled inside of Anakin as she helped him up off the floor.

"Well played," Aliyah said and Anakin nodded. "Well played."

Before they could say anything else they heard a loud, "WOAH!"

They both whipped around to see a whole body of younglings standing in the large archway. In front of them stood Yoda, who was nodding his approval. Anakin and Aliyah both exchanged horrified and shocked glances. They hadn't been aware anybody had entered the room, so caught up in their duel they'd been.

"I'm sorry Master," Aliyah said, sounding like a child about to get a scolding.

"Apologize not, padawan Albesh." Yoda spoke calmly, "Most impressive, that duel was. Well done, to you both."

Anakin and Aliyah both gave a small bow and a smile. "Thank you, Master jedi," Anakin said. "We were just about to leave."

Yoda nodded and stood out of the way as Aliyah and Anakin walked past him and the other younglings.

…

"You've talked about Aliyah quite a lot recently," said Padme dryly as Anakin went on yet another exclamation of the amazing duel they'd both gotten into. Anakin frowned as she had cut him off mid-sentence.

"She's my friend… why shouldn't I?"

"You never used to."

"I respect her a lot more now," said Anakin flippantly. "Anyway, when we were both going for – what is it?" Anakin demanded as Padme turned her gaze away.

"It's nothing… I'm being silly."

Anakin cocked his head in confusion, "Silly how?"

Padme bit her lip slightly before turning back to Anakin. "Do you love me?" she asked suddenly. Anakin blinked. Did he love her? Of course he did. The only problem was he wasn't sure whether or not he should tell Padme that.

"Why would you ask me that?" he asked cautiously. She sighed and turned away, "Please Anakin… just answer."

Anakin's heart sped up. This was the end, he knew it. This would be the end of their relationship. "Yes." He whispered.

When Padme turned to look back at him, he was surprised to see her smiling. "I'm not the only one then," she said, and before Anakin could ask what she meant she leaned up on her toes to give him a soft kiss. Even though it lasted only seconds, Anakin felt dizzy. He'd never thought in a million years that Padme would kiss him – maybe in his dreams. Now that she had he felt as though it weren't real, because it was too good to be true.

Padme looked at him, confused by his lack of reaction, but as soon as Anakin regained his senses he stooped down to kiss her again. As soon as they broke apart Anakin let out a chuckle. Padme gave him a bewildered look and he just shook his head, saying, "you have no idea how long I've wanted to do that."

Padme broke out into a large grin, lighting up her face, and ran her fingers across his cheek. "I love you."

The words made Anakin's heart soar.

…

**Woah! Short chapter much? So Anakin is 21 in this chapter… I think we all know what's going to be happening soon. *hint hint* **

**Hope you guys enjoyed!**

**So do you think Aliyah will ever get over Ash-Ke, or do you think that she's going to be better? **


	10. Jedi Attachments

**Chapter title:** Jedi attachments

…

"Oh! Look at that one!"

Shaal looked up at the night sky, trying to find out what star Karal was pointing at. "That one?" he asked, pointing to a blue one.

"No! That one!" she exclaimed, pointing towards a vibrant bright one. Shaal smiled, "that one is beautiful."

"Yes it is."

"Not as beautiful as you."

Had Karal not already been red, Shaal was pretty sure the young Togruta would have been blushing like mad. She ducked her head and had to bite back a small smile. "You shouldn't say such things," she said as she collected herself and turned to look at him. "Only if you mean them."

"But I do mean them!" Shaal exclaimed. "Why wouldn't I?"

Karal frowned, "because… it isn't proper."

Shaal averted his gaze downwards, "I can't help how I feel."

Karal just stared at him with her wide blue eyes, "I wish things were different… maybe if we weren't jedi…"

Shaal nodded, "If we weren't jedi, we'd be allowed to love each other."

Karal let out a deep sigh and looked back up at the stars. "We could do it, you know."

"Do what?" asked Shaal curiously.

"Have love for each other… nobody would ever have to know. It would be our secret."

Shaal turned to look at her, baffled. "Do you have any idea what that would cost us? My friends… my master… _your _master!"

Karal bit her lip, "It was only a suggestion."

Shaal glared at the ground, "well, it was a bad one."

As soon as the words slipped out of his mouth he realized exactly how it must have sounded to Karal. "I didn't mean that… you have to believe me. It wasn't supposed to come out like that –"

"No, I understand," Karal looked disappointed. "I should have known you would never do that. I admire you for that. You'll make a great jedi some day, Shaal."

With that she stood up to make her leave, but Shaal grabbed her arm. "Please."

Karal gave him a torn look. Shaal knew that she was debating on whether or not she should stay with him or leave for good. Apparently she decided that staying with him was for the best, because a moment later her eyes softened and she sat down next to him, holding his hand.

"Our secret?" Shaal whispered. He thought she never looked happier in her life. "Our secret." She agreed.

…

"Shaal, have you listened to a word I've said?" Surenit demanded. Shaal blinked out of his daydreaming, "I'm sorry Master, what was it you were telling me?"

Surenit sighed. "Your mind has been wandering a lot recently, padawan. You'd do better to listen to what I have to tell you."

"I know," Shaal ducked his head, ashamed.

Surenit lifted his chin up and looked at him seriously. "Whatever is bothering you, you know you can tell me."

"I know I can, Master."

Surenit nodded, "So is there anything you wish to tell me?"

Shaal pretended to think. "No Master, nothing that I can think of."

Surenit frowned but gave a tight nod, "Well, if you ever get bothered by something, I'm here to help. You're my padawan, I hate seeing you suffer." Shaal glanced away, feeling his heart quicken. "I'm sorry Master, I'll try paying more attention."

"There is no try." Surenit reminded him. Shaal nodded, "I will pay more attention to your teachings, Master."

Surenit looked pleased.

…

_4 months later_

"Shaal, I am deeply disappointed in you! How could you do this?"

Shaal looked at the ground, feeling as though his whole world had crumbled around him – which it very well could. His master had found out about him and Karal, though Shaal still had no clue how he did it. Of course, he had been anticipating this for a while, but now that the time had actually come he felt dread like no other. What was he supposed to say? I'm sorry, it won't happen again?

No, he couldn't do that. He was in love with Karal Nik, and he'd be damned if Surenit got in the way. He looked back up, his eyes hard. "I love her."

Surenit stopped his rant and stared at Shaal open-mouthed. "You love her?"

"I do. I want to be with her for as long as I live."

"You do realize that you can be kicked off of the jedi order for this?"

Shaal didn't say anything. He knew the repercussions already, and he'd be willing to take them for Karal. "I'm sorry, Master. I truly am, but if I have to be kicked out of the order to be with Karal… well then, so be it."

Surenit and Shaal both shared the same surprise at his speech. Shaal had never thought those words would ever come out of his mouth; he'd wanted to be a jedi more than anything when he was growing up. Then… things changed when he met Karal. He knew without a doubt that he would choose her over anybody, or anything, that the universe had to offer. He hadn't known what real love felt like until he met Karal.

"So, I guess this is the part when you go to the Council and tell them what I've done – what I've been doing. What I'm still doing and forever will be doing," Shaal growled.

Surenit gave him a long, hard look. "You forget your place, little one. You may be mature, but I'm still your master. I don't pretend to abuse this power, but sometimes I need to use it, if only to protect you."

"Protect me from what?" Shaal demanded. "From love?"

"From yourself."

Shaal stared at him. "What?"

Surenit shook his head. "Shaal, you've always been a great padawan learner, but things have gone too far."

"No they haven't," Shaal said stubbornly.

"Yes. They have," Surenit spoke in a calm voice. "Padawan, you and Karal must put aside your feelings for each other and move onwards."

Shaal felt his heart drop. "No!" he exclaimed heatedly. "No, I won't just shove aside my feelings for her because YOU told me to!"

"Shaal…" Surenit put on his warning voice, "you have to listen to what I'm telling you. I only want what's best!"

Shaal glared at him. "You don't know what's best for me."

"You must leave her!"

"I won't. I can't."

"Shaal, you have to leave her. I'm sorry."

"I can't!" Shaal's voice was desperate now.

"And why is that?"

"Because…." Shaal trailed off, his heart speeding up. "Because she's pregnant with my baby."

…

Shaal couldn't help but to feel betrayed as he stormed out of his quarters and stalked past jedi and padawans alike. His mind was in a turmoil. He wanted to be a jedi, more than anything in the world! At least… he _did_…

Shaal felt his russet hands ball up into fists. He loved Karal! He couldn't help his feelings. The way his master looked at him… he had wished more than anything that he could just brush off attachment like he would a speck of dust…

But… it was Karal. He would never betray her, not on his life. It was only dumb luck that Surenit had found out. Shaal was hardly surprised; Surenit Kli'qiy was a great many things, but unobservant was not one of them. He'd been suspicious about Shaal's 'going ons' when they weren't together ever since Shaal had met Karal.

Karal would be heartbroken when she heard that Surenit found out. She hadn't told her master either, who would surely be just as angry as Surenit was. He was so caught up in his thoughts he almost crashed straight into Anakin. He managed to skid to a halt at the last moment, only for it to have no effect as Anakin promptly bumped straight into him, apparently as deep in thought as Shaal was.

Anakin took a step back, an apology on his lips, before frowning at Shaal. "Something's wrong."

It wasn't a question. Shaal sighed; of all the people he had to bump into – it _would _be Anakin! Irritating when Shaal didn't need someone irritating him.

"Nothing's wrong," he practically growled, "Now move."

For a moment there was a flash of hurt in Anakin's eyes (some part of Shaal felt slightly ashamed of himself) before Anakin's eyes steeled over. "Not until you tell me what happened."

"No!"

"Yes!"

Shaal made to move past Anakin, but Anakin just stepped in front of him, blocking off all passage. Shaal actually did growl this time. "Anakin stop being so stubborn!"

"Tell me," Anakin said, ignoring the comment.

Shaal wasn't sure if he hated Anakin or loved him for being one of the only ones to see his anguished crying past cold barriers and covering masks. "Not here," Shaal finally said, glancing around. Shaal had meant for that to mean he'd say it at a later date, when he was composed, but Anakin simply grabbed his arm and dragged him down one of the hallways. Shaal's protests and fighting seemed to have no affect on Anakin, who simply shoved him into one of the empty padawan classrooms.

Shaal glared at Anakin, who simply rose one eyebrow at him in a silent inquiry of his previously asked questions – more like demands.

Shaal stared determinedly at the ground, trying hard to ignore the fact that Anakin was standing in front of him. He could practically feel something snap in Anakin and winced as the Force seemed to slap his body. No doubt because of Anakin. He'd always been more in-tune with the Force then the rest of them.

_Might be because he's the Chosen One, _Shaal's mind supplied dryly. This did nothing to improve his already foul mood.

"Why do you care so much?" he managed to get out, feeling Anakin's temper rising in the cold air.

"Because you're my best friend," Anakin's reply was simple. Shaal snapped his head up to look at Anakin, as though trying to detect any lie in his face. There was none.

Shaal sighed, suddenly feeling very exhausted. "Do you know Karal?"

Anakin's brows scrunched together as he racked his brain. His eyes widened slightly. Shaal knew that Anakin was starting to put two and two together. It was honestly scary how fast his brain worked and how quickly he figured out these things. There was no point in keeping secrets around Anakin Skywalker.

"…Shaal, you didn't…"

There didn't seem to be as much accusation or venom in Anakin's voice as there should be. In fact… Shaal looked closely at Anakin. He seemed to look almost sheepish – a guarded look had haunted his azure eyes.

"She's pregnant," he stated heavily, and Anakin seemed to deflate, leaning against the wall. "Pregnant?"

"I just found out," Shaal said. "Nobody knows – not even her master. Anakin, you can't tell anybody! Promise you won't tell?"

Anakin blinked, his thoughts seemingly elsewhere. "I won't," he said, looking at Shaal with clear eyes. "Can I ask you a question?"

Shaal held him under close scrutiny, knowing that he was going to ask something more about him and Karal…

"Would you have come to me and told me this if I hadn't dragged you in here and forced you?"

Shaal blinked. That… hadn't been the question he'd expected. He tilted his head as he thought about this. It would come out soon enough, and Shaal would have to tell all of them… but, would he have told Anakin beforehand? Eventually…maybe… yes.

"Yes," he murmured, staring at Anakin. Something was bothering him. "You seem troubled… is it because of me?"

Anakin looked confused for a moment, "What? No… no, it's great – I mean, good news if you guys weren't…" he trailed off. Shaal knew what he was trying to say. His eyes narrowed. Anakin looked on the verge of telling him something –

"I've got to go," said Anakin quickly, looking confused, guilty, and a little worried. "I won't tell anybody, you have my word."

Before Shaal could respond Anakin all but disappeared he walked out of the door so fast. He blinked. What had just happened…?

…

**Figured I'd try something different and spice things up with a switch of POV from Anakin to Shaal. I don't really like writing Shaal that much, especially in this chapter, seeing as he's hard to write when he's all freaking-out like this. It would have been easier if there was nothing on his mind, but… **

**Anywho, got a shocker in this chapter though. Karal is pregnant! What do you guys think, baby boy or baby girl? **

**Please tell me what you think! I'm sort of nervous that I won't get good feedback for this chapter… **


	11. Tell Them Anakin

**AN: If you want a visual to see what my OC's look like, go to these:**

**Make sure you get rid of any spaces and for the dots obviously use "."**

**Shaal Tano~ . / # / d5golif**

**Ash-Ke Leighton~ . / # / d5glum9**

**Aliyah Albesh ~ . / # / d5gkq77**

**Elenar'e Kilsh (Lena) ~ . / # / d4xfg9w**

**IF THESE LINKS DON'T WORK: I have them on my profile as well, so just go there. **

…

Chapter title: Tell them Anakin

…

Anakin felt torn and guilty as he left Shaal alone in his thoughts. He wished there was something to do to ease his friend's pain, but Shaal's predicament had Anakin thinking about his own… with Padme.

Anakin had no idea how much of a turn that he and the Senator's relationship would develop after four months. _Probably about as much as Shaal's had, _thought Anakin dryly, but then again Anakin and Padme's relationship apparently wasn't as _intimate _as Shaal and Karal's had been (judging by her pregnancy).

He'd been worrying and anxious about their relationship the whole day until Shaal had confessed his own love for Karal. Then he realized that Shaal's mood had managed to somehow shift Anakin's. Anakin never worried about his relationship with Padme. It had only been that one day.

He sighed, walking to his quarters quietly. Qui-Gon rose an eyebrow as he walked in, feeling oddly subdued.

"Something troubling you, Anakin?"

Anakin shook his head negative, his heart screaming _Yes! Yes! Everything!_

"Nothing, Master," he murmured. "Just tired."

Qui-Gon's lips twitched to a frown, and for a moment Anakin was certain that Qui-Gon was going to call out his bluff, but to his immense relief and surprise Qui-Gon simply turned away. "I think we should meditate for an hour, and then do lightsaber practice."

Anakin tilted his head – they always did lightsaber practice first and then meditation. Did Qui-Gon perhaps know that whatever troubling him was much deeper than normal? "Alright…"

…

Time seemed to pass quickly. Shaal had eventually told Lena and Aliyah (after much prodding from Anakin), so now they all knew and were all quiet about it. In a month or so Karal would start showing, and it was dangerous for her to do intense lightsaber training in her condition. Shaal had been even more subdued then usual – even though his master had eventually accepted the road that Shaal had taken when he started a secret relationship with Karal. Karal would almost definitely be kicked off of the order, and when people discovered who the father was, Shaal was in danger too.

Anakin was now sitting in Padme's quarters, deep in thought, with Padme resting her head on his shoulder. She grabbed his hand and gave it a comforting squeeze, and Anakin tightened his grip on hers in return. He was glad for her presence – he needed someone right now who was in the same boat as he was.

"Do you think we should tell him?" Padme asked quietly, voicing Anakin's own thoughts. He'd just finished telling her about Shaal's problem.

Anakin turned and pressed a kiss on the top of her head, leaning close. "Do you think it to be wise?"

Padme didn't answer for a long time. "…I think… I think he deserves to know," she finally said, seeming to choose her words carefully. "he needs to know that he's not alone – at least not fully. He needs someone to actually understand."

Anakin bit his lip, mentally debating. Padme was right – Shaal shouldn't be alone in facing this, especially when Anakin was more or less going through the same thing. Yet at the same time, he was worried. What if Shaal let it slip? When he didn't respond Padme looked up at him, the question still reflected in her eyes.

Anakin looked at her – his angel. The most beautiful woman he'd ever met in his entire life.

"I think… I think we should."

Padme nodded, and smiled sadly. "Do you want to be the one to do it? I mean… you've been his friend his entire life…"

Anakin nodded, "I think that would be best," he said, trying not to make it sound as though he didn't want her there. "It might be a bit overwhelming, since you guys don't really talk…"

Padme smiled and placed a soft kiss on his lips, causing Anakin's heart to flutter uncontrollably. Even to this day, her kisses felt like their first one. Perfect, amazing, great…

"Go tell him," she urged gently. "I'll be waiting."

…

Anakin cleared his throat loudly, and Shaal whipped around, feeling wary. Anakin bit his lip, looking slightly torn for a moment, before offering him a small smile, which Shaal returned almost hesitantly. Why did Anakin want to talk to him?

Anakin meanwhile, was asking himself the same question more or less. Should he really be doing this?

"Shaal… I have something to tell you…"

Shaal's eyes narrowed, and Anakin had to fight not to look away. "What is it?"

"Um… well… you know about you and Karal…?"

"Obviously," Shaal said shortly, cutting Anakin off. "What is it?" he repeated.

Anakin took a very deep breath, "I'm sort of in the same situation with someone…"

"What? Who! Why didn't you tell me – she's pregnant!?"

"No, no!" said Anakin quickly, "No, she's not pregnant. Erm, I was scared to tell you. I was going to – but I didn't know what her reaction would be… it's Padme."

At Shaal's confused look, Anakin decided to clarify. "Senator Amidala."

Shaal's eyes – if possible – got even wider. "Anakin!"

"I know –"

"That's worse than me and Karal! No offense or anything, but a _Senator? Former Queen?" _

Anakin grimaced. "I'll not tell your secret it you don't tell mine."

Shaal froze, and Anakin almost bit his lip again. That might not have been the most tactful thing to say…

"You'd tell on me?" Shaal asked in a low voice. Anakin sighed, "No, I wouldn't," he said truthfully. He didn't even know why he'd said that in the first place.

"I won't say anything," Shaal said, and Anakin could _swear _there was a part of him that looked relieved… or something along those lines.

"I just – wow…" Shaal shook his head, his lekku quivering slightly. He let out a slightly panicked laugh, "we're both screwed, aren't we?"

Anakin frowned, not agreeing with that statement at all but not saying anything in case he offended Shaal.

…

Anakin wasn't sure if he was imagining it or not, but Shaal seemed very clingy the rest of the week. He felt almost like Shaal was stalking him, trying to find his presence every other moment. Even Lena and Aliyah had started to notice.

When they questioned Anakin as to what had brought on the change, Anakin had thought up some lame excuse that would only buy him time, but not put off the inevitable. Shaal had to stop acting like that, or Anakin's relationship with Padme could get out. He pulled Shaal aside, asking if he wanted to sit with him during lunch. Shaal seemed absolutely thrilled, and Anakin felt something like guilt stirring in his chest. Though he'd have no clue as to why that was.

"Shaal?"

Shaal looked up, smiling at him. It seemed like the only person who he could truly smile at was Anakin (besides Karal). It made Anakin's heart break. He felt like Shaal had been… broken… whether it was because of Karal's pregnancy, or the fact that his mentor and friends knew it, Anakin wasn't sure, but Shaal had been…

Something changed.

Physically they had all changed. He'd never really thought about it before, but thinking back to the days when they were worried about getting sent to the 'Corps and becoming padawans. Anakin and Ash-Ke had their hair over their eyes, only for it to be cut off after the trials with a single braid which trailed down to their shoulders. Aliyah had the same braid, though she didn't have to cut off her hair; only keep it trimmed with the braid longer and with bright strands to stand out in her wavy, black hair. As neither Lena nor Shaal had hair, they wore clipped beads. All of the humanoid padawan's who didn't have hair wore those.

Anakin didn't really notice before, seeing as he had stopped talking to Lena and thought of Aliyah as something like a sister, but the two jedi padawan females had filled out. Anakin and Shaal both grew taller and more muscular. Anakin was taller than Shaal was, but Shaal's montrals had reached monstrous size with sharp curves. His lekku had also grown thick and lay heavy upon his chest and back, the length reaching down to his elbows. Lena's headtails had also grown longer, and the tips had taken on a rather odd hue of light violet in contrast to the rest of her dark blue body. She wore a thick silver band on her head, and wore it like a queen might wear a crown.

She was often seen stroking it, as though lost in thought, without really realizing what she was doing. She also liked to brag about the size and length that her lekku were growing. Anakin didn't get it. Shaal had lekku too, but he didn't go around showing the size off. Aliyah eventually explained that it was in a Twi'Lek's nature to have longer headtails, and that it should be seen as pride. Anakin still didn't see the point. Maybe it was something like a padawan braid. The longer it was, the more respect you earned.

Either way, he was more concerned about Shaal's mental health at the moment. The stress that he'd been under had seemingly alleviated when he found out about Anakin's secret relationship, but the dark bags under his eyes spoke differently.

"Shaal…" Anakin repeated again, not really sure where he was going to go with this. Shaal rose a white eyebrow, waiting for him to continue. Anakin took a deep breath, "you've um… you've become…" _rather clingy, _"you seem to have taken a liking to my presence more than you did before…ever." Anakin sighed, "and… I'm thinking it's because of our situations…" Anakin was really sucking at this. Shaal was staring at him.

"You're my friend," Shaal tilted his head, looking rather concerned. As though Anakin should be the one to get his head checked.

"I know, I know… it's just… don't you think you've been a bit…?" Oh force, he couldn't do this.

"A bit what?" a hint of steel had clipped Shaal's voice, and Anakin hurriedly continued, "you seem to favor my company more than you ever did before – I get it –" Anakin cut off Shaal, who had opened his mouth to reply. "I already know why. It's just… tone it down a bit, please?"

Anakin hated adding the 'please', but he had to try something. Shaal stared at him for a long moment, before sighing and seeming to deflate.

"You're right," the young Togruta admitted, feeling very tired. "It's just… I feel like you can understand…" he shook his head, looking down.

"I can – I do!" Anakin exclaimed. "I really do understand… it's just… Lena and Aliyah have started noticing something… and if they found out –"

"Why don't you tell them?" Shaal suggested, and Anakin stared at him.

"_Tell them?" _he choked out, startled.

"Yes, tell them," said Shaal, not seeing the big deal in it. He'd told them after all. It was only fair Anakin should.

"I don't want them to know," said Anakin quickly. Shaal frowned, "that's surprising, seeing as you were bugging me to tell them about _my _situation."

Anakin glared at the table. Shaal was using his own words against him… that backfired.

"Listen, like you said before, our situations differ too. Padme is a _Senator_! If… no, I can't, I promised her I would only tell you."

"So you're going to keep our friends – _our friends – _in the dark because she told you to?"

"Of course not!"

"Then…?"

"I made a promise both to myself and to her that I would only tell you about us. If you can't respect that…" Anakin shook his head, unwilling to believe that Shaal would force him into this.

There was silence, in which Anakin held his breath, when Shaal finally sighed. "I can see there's no getting through you – stubborn twit."

Anakin smirked slightly at that, though he kept his head bowed so that Shaal wouldn't see. "So… nobody finds out?"

"Nobody finds out," Shaal said, "against my better judgment."

This time Anakin looked up and smiled at him, making Shaal feel slightly guilty about his earlier behavior. "Come on then, let's grab something to eat."

…

**So, do you guys think that Shaal will be able to keep Anakin's secret, especially when Anakin forced Shaal to tell his own? **

**Please review and tell me what you thought about this chapter. **


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